Yelling at Your Kids Will Not Teach Them
Yelling at Your Kids Will Not Teach Them
If you're a parent, you realize that sometimes your feelings get the best of you. Somehow your children can truly press those buttons you didn't know could be pressed and before you know it, you’re hollering from the top of your lungs. Most parents yell at their children from time to time but overtime, yelling at your children will turn into a bad habit.
It's a well-known saying – “Yelling loses effectiveness over time. A child who gets yelled at on a regular basis will begin to tune you out.”
You're not the only one who does so and your feelings of parental frustration are common. Another issue with yelling is that it doesn't show kids how to properly deal with their anger. Fortunately, you can change the manner in which you talk to your children, switching from a yelling monologue to a respectful dialogue.
Why Yelling Is Not Effective
There are a few reasons why yelling isn't the right type of discipline and is, in fact, a typical control mistake. Here are a few reasons why you should lower your voice and calm down before you discipline your child:
You Are Teaching Your Child That Anger Is a Good Thing
Although raising your voice may help discipline your child at that given time, it's essential to consider what yelling is teaching them. When you speak loudly, your child discovers that aggression is an acceptable way to communicate.
Yelling Will Lose Its Effectiveness Over Time
Will yelling get your point across for the time being? Yes. But consider this: raising your voice constantly can dull the effectiveness of yelling or utilizing a firm manner of speaking later on. It's similar to someone crying wolf all the time; in the end, you would tune them out.
Your Child Will Retreat or Become Angry
Individuals have a natural reaction to being yelled at. We either withdraw or respond in anger. These are the responses you will get from your child when you lose your cool. If in the end your child fixes their behavior, you ought to think about whether or not it merits the cost.
You Are Showing That You Can’t Control Your Emotions
Disapproval, distress, and anger are weapons in a parent's discipline arsenal but yelling shows your kid that you are not in charge - something you definitely don't need when you are stating authority.
Follow Through With a Consequence
Avoid nagging or repeating a warning over and over again. Start by understanding why your child is behaving that. Kids might know about the impacts of e-vape but they likely don't have a clue about all of the relevant information. Make sure to take the opportunity to advise your child regarding the risks of vaping. Teach them about how addiction works by explaining that it gives you a false feeling of security.
If you find that it is affecting you on a very emotional level, the first step may be to reach out for help. LJARI is here as a trusted friend, a mental health professional, or a coach to support you as you address these thoughts and move forward in a positive direction. Remember that according to LJARI, yelling is not the right solution. Instead, try taking your child’s favourite things for 24 hours or giving them some additional tasks to do. Doing so will convince your child to think twice about defying you again.
By Contributor: Dimitrous Chattman, Community Ambassador